"Crystalline lifetime - fragments of Asperger syndrome "

Luke Jackson, 2006

This illustrated collection of Luke Jacksons insightful and often poignant poems offers a glimpse of the emotional and visual sensibilities of people on the autism spectrum in their adolescent years – perhaps the most challenging time for anyone with Asperger Syndrome (AS). Luke writes perceptively about identity, struggle, loneliness, love and the pursuit of happiness, and about finding calm amid the often overwhelming confusion and frustration that accompanies AS

An excerpt

I've heard it said before that a picture is worth a thousand words, except nobody ever says what these words are. Writing a story through pictures has long been a fascination of mine, though it has made me realize that nothing is said about the words the picture tells because the story changes and twists depending on who the viewer is – the picture is just the idea.

In the same way, when words are put together in the right way, they create images in the mind of the person browsing, a full short film that takes on the thoughts and feelings of not only the writer, but the reader.

Looking at some of the pictures and poems I'd written, I found that a lot of them fit together well, so in the pages that follow, I've included some of my own thoughts and feelings at the time of writing, in word and image form.

Signing the contract for this was the hardest job in putting together what you're about to read, as a lot of these poems are personal to me, and reflect on what I was thinking/feeling at that time.

Just note before you start to read that I've changed a lot and come a long way since I wrote these poems – I just hope that they will give you some insight into what things were like for me back then and help you to realize that life doesn't stand still.

Luke Jackson

Real

When you people look at me
What is it you think you see?
A frightened boy
Alone, afraid,
Or just a foolhardy charade?
Do you see through the shell I make?
Look closely at your empty fate;
Is this who you want to be?
A shell born of transparency?
Wake up, open your eyes,
To see the nothingness inside
A hollow shell, bereft of pride
Moulded by society, hollow
Is this the path you want to follow?

But is it true
What you think you see?
Or is it a fake?
Not the real me?
You dont know;
Probably dont care
But when you next see yourself
Beware.
Do you see yourself, real and true?
Or do you see a farce, not you?